Check and Mate

I cant say that its not true... i can't stop seeing it in you... I can hear it all around you... like the mighty bells are ringing loud... the footsteps are marching down... chanting... someone to hold on to... someone holding me... victimized no longer... maybe nothings free... But if I paid for it everyday... and scorned it every night... for every breath I took... would that be really what it's like?...If I can feel the fingernails scratching down my back... the coldness from your eyes... the fire in their laugh... I don't step so lightly... after the attack... I won't let your past... be a part worth getting back... Labelled as effigy burning in the dark... A life held so closely.. Never to be one part.. Two pieces together.. That make it with in a breath... Something to hold on to... Until nothings left..

Recoiled

There's always something to be said... from the back of the room... You hear the words... the voice no one listens to... The sounds are forgotten... The wall flower in full Bloom... Eyes on the floor... Waiting for truth... The smiles are decieving... He wants to break loose... pull away the curtains... Escape his cocoon... Pushed away... thrown out like the trash... addicted to the feelings... he'll never get back... from you... Stay out of the darkness... light that candle and laugh... It'll be the something... the darkness can't back... Your not the waste... they made the mistake... Don't loose any more sleep... because their smiles were fake... The place that your in.... These unwanted thoughts... A trial of life.... Your every breath fought... They will listen to that voice... because it's in their head... They rememer it all when finally...nothing's left... Just because you have their attention... Doesn't mean you have their respect...

Verbal Pollution

The best mess I'd like to address… Would best be explained slowly… Thoroughly and properly… With no distractions stopping me… I insist on saying what I mean to say… What I meant to be is… Well… Anyway… It may be something you may want to mention… A word simply heard to get your attention… To instantly react to my plan of attack… Would be disobedient to your lack of prevention… If I may be allowed to enable some how… A word to encourage apprehension… If I were to pick up… And never have been struck…  Is it worth any livable comprehension?.. That's what I mean… To be at all unclean… Is this the low form of ascension?.. To enable a lift… Of some un-claimed gift… And allow it to be my detention… I can strive to be unable to hide… A mediocre state that I'd rather not mention… But after some thought… And more excuses bought… It's just a time tested state of expansion… A spirit in me… That's created to see… Just how accurate I can clarify position… If the place that I'm in… Is hereditary not whim… Than maybe I am a genealogical disaster… The ability to sustain… In my own vocational way… Well that's a derivative… I'm chemically formed to master… If I am to exhibit a persona of exquisite… Than my disposition is not of an acquirable taste…  But to speak of it so abruptly and not let it corrupt me… Would only forgo any signs of restitution… That a reason to believe… Is not only to see… A plan made of verbal pollution…    

Apogee- Perigee

Theres no voices in my head just words on a page. If I have no one to talk to than maybe this will be the same. I'm gonna keep rambling every single day. I don't no how to make sense of any of this but somethings pushing me. PUSHING me. So I'll go with it. Let the push take me let the words shake me and then see where I land. Its only a words and words do things. They make me get up they make me think. I don't no what to do with myself. But Im not in this just for me. They are here and here they stay I couldn't ask for it any other way. If its not enough to do this for me. Well thats just stupid. There are three. Those lovely faces that are in my mind. The tick for every second.. the word in every rhyme. I can only take the words I got the wars I've won the times I fought. But the battle will never end and the fears only push away. After all. There words on a page. Keep on hearing them and now they are out. This is what I am. All of what I'm not. I want this more than ever and I.. Over and over and over again if this is what I'm built like than it must be who I am. A path I ran from all the days of night just sick of being scared of who I'm really like. I don't want to put this away. I wanna hold it I wanna stay. If it will clear out my head and bring me new thoughts. If it will calm the storms and push past the rocks. Maybe I need it to roll. Maybe I need it to stop… Maybe it needs to sing maybe I should never let it go maybe it should breathe. Living inside I won't let it die it wont burn out It doesn't hide… But the more words I spill the more they refill and I'll let them flow and help me rebuild..